Squire’s Isle Created by Geonn Cannon

“When Bad Sex Happens to Good People,” A Squire’s Isle Day Story!

Summary: HAPPY SQUIRE’S ISLE DAY (July 12)! The ladies of Squire’s Isle encounter some… problems in the bedroom.

In which Nadine discovers the dangers of oral sex during allergy season

It wasn’t a special occasion or a planned interlude; it was just a night when they both got to bed early enough to spare half an hour before going to sleep. Kissing and stroking quickly turned into something more. Nadine took the initiative, shifting to lie on top of Miranda as her hands busily untied her wife’s pajama bottoms. Miranda lifted her hips and Nadine lifted up to push them down. As Miranda did high-steps under the blankets to work her pants all the way off, Nadine slid down to kiss her way down Miranda’s body. She wet her lips and then curled her tongue around two fingers, propping herself up between Miranda’s legs as she got her wet. Miranda ran her hands through Nadine’s hair, watching her lovingly as she bent down and kissed the spot where Miranda’s thigh met her hip.


It was the first thing they’d said since exchanging goodnights, and Nadine lightly teased with the flat of her tongue before adding the moist tip of her index finger. Miranda pushed herself up against the pillows and closed her eyes, breathing deeply as she braced herself for what was coming next. She lifted her feet and rested them on Nadine’s back to push her flat on the mattress, and Nadine settled with her head on Miranda’s lap, her lips and tongue forming an alliance with her fingers to work Miranda into a frenzy.

Slowly, Nadine pushed Miranda toward orgasm, taking her time and occasionally looking up to meet Miranda’s glazed eyes. Miranda smiled and brushed the bangs away from Nadine’s forehead, then sagged back against the pillows with a pleasurable sigh. As she got closer to orgasm she began to breathe deeper. Her nose tickled, and she brought up one hand to cover the lower half of her face before she sneezed three times in quick succession. She sniffed, rubbed her hand under her nose, and looked down to see Nadine was sitting up and holding her ears.

“Baby?” Suddenly she realized that when she sneezed, her thighs had closed around Nadine’s head, essentially boxing her ears. “Dean! Oh, my God, are you okay?”

“Yeah. Ow.”

Miranda leaned down and put her fingers under Nadine’s chin. She turned her head one way, kissed that ear, and then turned it the other way to kiss its twin.

“Ow is right. I’m so sorry.”

Nadine smiled. “It’s okay. Just a little ringing. Worth it, considering what I was getting in return.”

Miranda chuckled. “Maybe next time you can wear a hard hat and ear protection.”

“Mm,” Nadine purred as she stretched up, pushing Miranda back down onto the mattress. “Maybe a tight white tank top and a tool belt, too…”

“Just how long are these renovations supposed to take, Miss Forewoman?”

Nadine nipped Miranda’s bottom lip and spoke in a smooth, Georgian drawl she reserved for special occasions. “Well, Missus Powell, that all depends on what sort of incentives you offer…”

Miranda laughed and pulled Nadine down to her.

In which Kate discovers the move to a bigger home can’t come fast enough
A few years ago Kate would have stared wide-eyed at anyone who told her a poly relationship could work. The mechanics of it just didn’t seem feasible. It was hard enough finding time for one person, let alone two. And she knew without a doubt that one person who be loved less than the other. It was just common sense. Then she fell in love with Amy, and their mutual lust for their friend Nicole turned into something deeper. She realized that a three-way relationship could exist, it just couldn’t be forced. It had to be something that happened naturally.

Much like the sex itself had to happen naturally. When she got out of the shower, she found Amy and Nicole were already in bed. Nicole was in her underwear and Amy was in a long nightshirt, lying on their sides to face each other. Kate watched from the foot of the bed and then crawled up to join them. She stroked their hips as they touched each other, so enthralled by the sight of two women she adored pleasuring each other that she didn’t even care if she got a turn.

But her lovers wouldn’t deprive her. Amy let herself be pushed right to the edge of orgasm before gently removing Nicole’s hand, pushing herself up, and pulling Kate to her using the knot of the towel wrapped around her body. The knot came loose as they kissed, and Nicole pulled the damp terrycloth away. Kate adjusted herself on the bed, cupping Amy’s breast through her shirt as Nicole kissed her way down Kate’s still-wet body.

Kate leaned back to give them both room to maneuver, gasping as her kiss with Amy broke. Nicole nuzzled Kate’s pubic hair as Amy ducked her head and began to lick and tease Kate’s left nipple to erection. Kate curled her hand on the back of Amy’s head and leaned back so she could watch both of her girls loving her.

There was a moment when she knew what was about to happen and there was nothing she could do to save herself. She managed to let go of Amy’s head and Nicole’s shoulder, saving them the same fate as she slipped off the edge of the bed and landed with a decidedly ungrateful thud on the bedroom floor. “Oh, shit. Kate!”

“I’m fine, Ames,” Kate said from her crumpled position on the ground. Nicole scrambled off the bed and knelt next to her, and Kate winced reassuringly. “I think I bruised my butt bone.”

“Poor baby.” She bent down and kissed Kate’s lips, then offered her a hand to help her up. Kate grunted, rubbed her back between the dimples of her ass, and climbed back onto the bed. Amy gathered Kate in her arms and kissed a line across her chest.

“If your ass is hurt, that just means we’ll have to keep you on top.”

Kate grinned as Nicole pressed against her from behind, protectively squeezing her. “And next time you fall, you can use me as padding.”

Kate said, “With those tits, I might just bounce.”

Nicole spanked her.

“Hey! Careful with the injured area.”

“Sorry. Let me kiss it and make it better.”

Kate smiled at Amy, kissing her as Nicole ran her tongue down the middle of Kate’s back so she could tend to the wound.

In which Rachel and Alex take a chance to talk
Alex reached for the strap of the harness, then smoothed her palm over it and decided to keep it on for the time being. She took a deep breath and folded her hands on her stomach, staring at the dildo rising from her crotch. All dressed up and possibly nowhere to go. She let her eyes wander the room, to the discarded teddy Rachel had taken off mere moments before The Incident, to the candles flickering on the nightstand. She didn’t want to blow them out for the same reason she had left the harness on; she was still hopeful the night could be salvaged.

The bathroom door opened and those hopes were dashed by the baggy pink pajamas Rachel had put on. She gestured at the harness and scratched her arm. “You can probably take that off,” she said morosely. “You’re not going anywhere near my waistline tonight.”

Alex tried not to look too despondent. “That’s all right.” She knew that their schedules were so aligned that she’d most likely get hers tomorrow; it was just luck of the draw that Rachel’s was first. She unfastened the harness and put it back in their drawer as Rachel crawled into bed beside her. She retrieved the shirt she wore for bed and squirmed into it without getting up, then leaned over and blew out the candles to cast the room into almost full darkness.

“I’m sorry,” Rachel whispered.

“Don’t be.” She found Rachel’s hand in the dark. “It happens.”

“Yeah, but tonight of all nights? When we have this big romantic evening planned, the second things get sexual, I have to run to the bathroom for a tampon. What would Dr. Kellogg say about that?”

“She would say correlation does not equal causation. They’re just two things that happened to occur at the same time.” She rubbed her fiance’s arm and rolled to face her. “This does not mean you’re scared or skeptical about the wedding. It doesn’t mean you want out or you don’t find me attractive. It just means you’re a human woman with cycles that sometimes get in the way of your fun times.”

Rachel rolled onto her side as well. “You’re not pissed at me?”

Alex shook her head. “Why would I be?” She brushed the hair out of Rachel’s face. “Right now you just feel very vulnerable and hormonal. You’re thinking you failed the assignment and that means we’ll have to confess failure to Dr. Kellogg at the next appointment. But I don’t think she meant we had to have sex. I think this might be exactly what she meant.”

Rachel raised an eyebrow. “She wanted me to get my period right before you fucked me?”

“No. But I think she would be happy to know we had to face disappointment in the bedroom. Let’s face it, sex is one of the places we definitely do not have a problem and we never have. So having a problem now… not that it’s a problem, but hey. We’re not having sex right now.”

Rachel chuckled. “Yeah. So if we can get through this… maybe Dr. Kellogg will see it as a breakthrough.”

Alex nodded. “Exactly.” She brushed Rachel’s hair again and kissed her forehead. “I am just as excited to spend the night holding you as I am for anything else.”

“Good. Although… my mouth still works. And if history can be trusted, we don’t have to worry about any unexpected visitors for you until tomorrow.” She walked her fingers down the middle of Alex’s chest and bit her bottom lip. “Would that count toward resolution of the conflict?”

“I think Dr. Kellogg would applaud your outside-the-box thinking.”

Rachel lifted the blankets and scooted down. “I may do a little teasing outside-the-box. But it’s mostly the inside I’m focusing on.” She winked and ducked her head under the blankets to finish what she’d started earlier.

In which Jill’s body is no friend to her
After Patricia rubbed the lotion on Jill’s stomach, she stretched up and began kissing her neck in a way that had always proven enjoyable in the past. Her hands, still wet with the lotion, moved up to Jill’s breasts and held them to feel how full they had become. Jill’s body had shifted and changed so much over the past few weeks, changes that she thought overshadowed her beauty. Patricia took every opportunity to prove that she loved each and every change; her stomach, her hips and thighs, her breasts… every change was an indication that their baby was healthy and growing.

She knelt behind Jill and teased her nipples, moving her lips up to Jill’s ear. She whispered, “You look so beautiful, sweetheart.”

Jill farted.

Patricia pressed her lips together, but Jill saved her by laughing first. “Jill Hood-Colby, mistress of seductive foreplay. Sorry, sweetie.”

“It’s fine. Your body is hard at work right now so there’s bound to be some…” Her eyes widened. “Exhaust fumes. Holy cow…”

Jill twisted away from her. “God.” She reached for the nightstand to light a candle as Patricia retreated to the other side of the bed. They both covered their noses as Jill turned to face her partner and chuckled. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I went through the same thing when I was pregnant with Michael. Not exactly this potent, but you have always had this problem.”

Jill’s eyes widened. “I have not!”

“Honey, you queef in bed all the time. I just never mentioned it because… hell, I don’t care. It’s not worth stopping for.”


“It’s a word.”

“Not in my language.”

Patricia rolled her eyes. “You teachers all think you’re so smart. With your book learning.” She waved her hand to dispel the cloud, the smell of which was already being overwhelmed by the sandalwood candle Jill was holding. She put the candle back on the nightstand, then gently guided Jill down onto the mattress. “Gassy, sweaty, irritable…”

“Fat, stinky, gross…”

Patricia rubbed her hand over Jill’s stomach. “Glowing. I’ll take you any way I can get you, Mrs. Hood-Colby.” She kissed her wife passionately and knelt between her legs. “It’s going to take more than a toot to keep me off you.”

Jill smiled and settled more comfortably against the pillows. She honestly hadn’t been fishing for the compliment, but she should have known to trust Patricia to come to the rescue. If there was even a hint of depression or self-esteem problems, Patricia was right there to hold her hand. She also knew when to respect her boundaries. As quickly as Patricia could pounce on a potential problem, she was just as quick to retreat if Jill said she needed her space. It was what made her a good mayor and a great lover, and the perfect partner to have a child with.

Jill moved her feet apart and closed her eyes as Patricia continued her downward journey. There were worse things in the world than an inadvertent emission and a partner overeager to prove her attraction was as strong as ever.

In which Jaime and Leah discover a downside to having children
They were spooning in bed, with Jaime acting as the big spoon. They were entwined, legs twisted under the blankets and Jaime’s right hand between Leah’s legs. Her other hand was inside Leah’s unbuttoned pajama top, rhythmically squeezing her breast as she whispered in her ear. “The things you do to me,” Jaime murmured, letting the tip of her tongue trace the line of her partner’s jaw. She was speaking with a very pronounced British accent, Leah’s request. It was a kink to her, and Jaime was more than happy to oblige. “You drive me crazy, you know that? Absolutely wild with desire. I’ve never felt this way for anyone.”

Leah moaned and tightened her thighs around Jaime’s hand. “I’m close.”

“Good girl.” She dragged her middle finger, wet with Leah’s juices, up to her clit. She circled it. “My darling girl, my sweet and beautiful love. I had to cross an ocean, traverse a continent, just to find you and I’m not going to let you go, so you’d better come for me. You’d better come right… fucking… now. Give it to me, my beautiful–”


“Shite.” Jaime rolled onto her back as Leah folded in on herself, quickly buttoning up the front of her pajamas before tugging her shorts back into place. The door opened, flooding the bed with light from the hallway, and Jaime exhaled casually as she pushed her hair back and widened her eyes. “Darling, what are you doing up? It’s nearly midnight.”

Her ten-year-old daughter stood in the doorway still in her jammies with her hair standing wild and manic. She was holding her stuffed whale – a gift from Leah – tight against her chest.

“I had a bad dream.”

Jaime pursed her lips. “Aw, my sweet girl. Come here.” She surreptitiously wiped her fingers on the sheet as the girl crossed the room. She leaned over the edge of the bed and hugged her. “I know it seemed scary but it was just a dream. You’re safe. You have mummy and Leah here to watch over you, so nothing bad will happen. And if anything does happen, we’ll be right there to protect you from it. Okay?” She kissed Pamela’s forehead and rubbed her arms. “Think you can go back to sleep?”


“Good girl. Want me to tuck you in?”

Pamela said, “Can Leah do it?”

Leah had been rubbing her eyes, but she stopped and looked at the girl. “Sure. Of course, I’d be honored if it’s okay with your mom.”

“It’s more than okay.” She kissed Pamela’s cheek noisily. “Go now. You have school in the morning.”

Leah climbed out of bed, tugging the tail of her shirt down over her shorts before she went around to the other side of the bed. She took Pamela’s hand to guide her out of the room, looking over her shoulder to see Jaime watching with pride. Leah took the girl down the hall, helped her back into bed, and tucked the thick blue covers back up over her thin body.

“There you go. All set? Need a glass of water or anything?”

Pamela shook her head and clutched her toy. “Do you love mommy?”

Leah smiled. “Very, very much.”

She looked down into the face of the whale. “Do you love me, too?”

“Pamela, if I loved you any more, I think I would just… explode into two people just to hold all the love.” She tucked the girl’s hair behind her ear. “I love you very, very much.”


Leah said, “Do you love me?”

Pamela shyly nodded her head, then buried her face against the fluffy body of her toy. “I love you, Leah.”

“Sweet dreams, sweet girl.” She stood up and kissed the top of her head. “Goodnight.”

She turned on the little lamp next to the light switch, looked back to blow Pamela a kiss, and then left the room. Jaime was waiting in the hallway and she waited until the door was closed before she spoke in a low whisper.

“I love you very, very much, too. Just for the record.”

Leah smiled and kissed her. “Then what do you say we go pick up where we left off?”

“Sounds ideal to me.” She flicked the tip of her tongue against Jaime’s top lip, then took her hand to guide her back to bed.

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